It was a pleasant morning that day.. didn't see this coming. My Spider sense was in Silent mode.. dammit!. The morning began with a HR Session, which was hilarious in the short-term and ironically tragic too.
Anyways it started raining real hard sometime around noon or that's when I noticed it. People started leaving. I, in my infinite wisdom, decided to wait till it clears up and then leave. Soon after the lights go out.. the power companies do not want to risk it as their transformers are already submerged. 5pm, out of the blue, I get a free ride home invite from Mr. P (names withheld for no reason whatsoever). Me and three others jump at this (This was Mr.P's play of the day.)
Cut to.. it's 6 pm we are at the gates of the office complex, the roads are jammed. I'm thinking are these walls to keep out intruders or to prevent the inmates from escaping. At 7 we are making snail-like progress on the JVLR or whatever remained of the JVLR at that time. Now we are driving in the dark with hordes of people walking it out and they are moving faster than us. As we go forward, water level rises. My feet are cool... that's because now we have water seeping into the car. Praying the car will see us home, Mr. P fights it out against the lashing rain and 1mm visibility.
Now we are in the drop zone (kanjurmarg - a place that can put Atlantis to shame for the speed at which it submerges each time someone leaves a tap running.). So we had people telling us to get into the wrong lane coz the other lane was right under deep water. Right at that divine alignment, the car fumes and gives up. Tired of abuse I guess.. So we have a stalled car in the wrong lane, no visibility, deadlocked vehicles and people walking past us. There won't be a better time to get out of the car. Then it was a blur, we were running around in the rain, instructing other people to move their vehicles, pushing our car a few cms at a time, diffused the traffic, too many things. I (with some assistance) moved a BEST bus that day
Most of us accept Mr.P's invite to a free night's stay at his place. I once again feel like I'll reach home (if I've come this far .. syndrome). So me and another friend who stays nearby hit the road again.
I am trying to catch a bus (I saw a few going down that road) to reach Point X from where I again catch a ride home. It seemed like an hour before a bus arrived. It had just enough space for me (in Mumbai terms it means - enough to stick my right foot in). So the bus went wading thru the water. (Incidentally the guy whose house was nearby happened to spend the night on the road coz he couldn't get into his building but that another story...). So I'm hanging like a rag-doll out of the bus, the rain on my brow, the water is knee-high, floating vehicles, etc.etc... It's nearly mid-night. This bus won't take me all the way home and the chances of getting another ride are low.
The bus stops somewhere in between. Two guys try to get in and in their tussle, the strap of my bag broke and it goes underwater. My bag is nowhere to be seen, I jump out. Fortunately there are some people standing and the bag gets caught up in their legs. Those guys (thanks buddies!) hand over my bag back smiling. I grab it and jump back to claim my place.
The bus trudges on.. water level is rising.. I see ground floors of buildings almost underwater..
I think to myself.. God seems to be giving me a *subtle* hint here. He poured enough water to make Mumbai submerge ( later newspapers claimed it was a record - most rainfall in a hundred years) He created enough traffic to make us go back into our offices. We didn't listen. He turned off the power to make it pitch dark. He then blew up Mr.P's car. He shut down transport so we had to walk. He made sure that no buses could run with Mumbai's clogged drainage system (he has got some connections in the BMC). Cell phone networks are non-operational. I am soaked to the bone and been on my way home for the past 6 hours.. What did it all add up to ?
So finally I become one with the Force and step off the bus. I make my way to my friends Nitin's place. The water current almost sweeps me off my feet a couple of times. I brave my way upstream and finally at some time around midnight, I am outside Nitin's doorstep and ring the doorbell. I can only imagine what a sight I must have been for his Mom. It turned out my friend himself was stuck at HIS friend's place.. talk about God's far out design patterns (:P)! Anyways she played good samaritan to the T. I got dry clothes, best food I've eaten in a while (she cooked it up in a flash!). I had water, food, books and TV (my 4 essentials). I slept comfortably. Before I forget, I SOLEMNLY THANK NITIN's MOM for EVERYTHING !!! The next day I waited for some news on the telly stating that transport had begun. Air traffic was closed and people were stuck on rail stations for nearly half a day. The rains hadn't let up. The govt complained once again that it was a freak case.. In India, something has to happen before the infra for dealing with that is setup (remember the Tsunami??) Pathetic !!! So then I switched on my friend's comp and read an Asterix. Infinitely more fun.
Finally at some time near noon, I decide that it is time for me to begin the second leg of Tour'de'Kalwa.
So I change back into gear. Pick up my stuff. I get a rick to Mulund check naka 10 bucks! I was pleasantly surprised that Mumbaikars were actually helping each other in times of calamity. I now have high hopes of actually making it home without shelling out a fortune. To put fwd a frame of reference, from this point a ride to my home cost 25 units. I now found that the snivelling, gross gremlins driving ricks here were now charging 40 a seat (they will stuff atleast 4 in a rick meant for 3) coming to 120-160. I then proceeded to rename them with more colorful names that I could think of in my mind. I saw people being stuffed like sardines into tempos (200 bucks a person for a trip to Kalyan). This snapped me out of my Mumbaikar (but then there are more immigrants now than ever) reverie. As soon as Nature took her foot off their scrawny throats, these people get up and kick other people in the teeth, who haven't still managed to get to their feet. Bloody third cousins of the maggots at Kanjur rickshaw stand!! I resolved to not give a single dime to these leeches. I WALKED home, yes I did. I saw on the way home that Thane did not seem to be that hit by last night's mayhem except that everything was wet n squishy. I helped a couple of rickies push their dead tin tricycles thry knee deep water. You know when a stranger smiles at you, for helping him when there is nothing in the world that you are getting in return.. and it kinda lingers in your memory for a while. I got one of 'em. Ok too much mush.. I walked n walked... fast fwd. Now I'm in Kalwa, home stretch. I go down my most trodden way only to see a huge lake of water... backtrack take another route in. This one is significantly less. I wade thru knee deep water to my building.. I see lots of people just splashing around.. making the most of what God has hosed them with I guess. I am upto my ass in mucky brown water and my brain went 'Yes I see it... This is Shanghai just waiting to happen!'
I was glad that the entire ordeal ended (I am sure that you are also in a similar state now thanks to my painfully meticulate depiction.. the power of writing)
I then proceed to getting all washed up and made the mistake of heaving a huge sigh of relief! Some how after the rains eased up, the water level kept on rising (there were some unconfirmed rumors of a nearby Dam being opened ) .
Time for some snappy art-work (http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2123012951&code=17908966&mode=invite&DCMP=isc-email-Album Invite)
The morning saw people indulging in impromptu tourism.
To bring you closer to the end of this tirade, there was no electricity for the next 3 days, consequently no water for the next 4 days. Food supplies dimished. Piles of garbage materialized along roadside as a bizarre memorial to the deluge. The public transport system disappeared in one blur of miscommunication, misadministration, finger-pointing and lack of accountability. Representatives of the people turned into apparitions.. never seen in the daylight. People turned to the streets, some died in stampedes and other waiting for medication.Things crawled back to normal.
I was wondering I pay a lot of money as tax to the government. It's been 50 yrs+ since independence. My housestill suffers from power cuts and water cuts. I still get ripped off everyday coming to office (courtesy of the Kanjumarg looters! You wanna be a crorepati don't waste time trying to get in KBC. Buy a Rick and get in line here.) Mars has fewer craters compared to the old Bombay Poona road, which runs near my house. Getting home in a local train beats even the scariest ride in Essel World hand down. I do not trust anyone who is trying to sell me something (ok that may be my issue). I can't even get a decent broadband connection without falling into the cablewallah nexus. I got a cell from MTNL the country's major telecom corp and they too are busy sticking me with bills for no-service for having the urge to try one of their services. (Now I just bite my lip till the urge passes.). There is this overpowering stench of public apathy in the air. Anything goes here and will go again as long you know someone with clout. Nice guys don't finish last they are squished! Mera bharat Mahan ? yeah right !! Oh god, I've started whining again... got to make better use of my time! I'll read some MSDN to get into a stoned state.
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